Centaur Guitar at the NAMM Show Vol. II

This post was written by Little Big J on January 18, 2010
Posted Under: NAMM 2010

Look, look, I know we’re a day or two late here… I’ve just been so busy. You have no idea the responsibilities of a socialite like me. I mean seriously, Steve, seriously, I had urgent appointments with so many celebrities and spokespersons and whatnot.

Well I’m here to make it up to you. What follows is an entirely accurate and truthful portrayal of the collected events of Friday afternoon that together make up:

I’ll be straight with you. Friday was a bit rough. It started rough and just got worse. Maybe some of you guys remember poor little KK… (if not click here…) KK was a nice little guitar that we had a while back that just went bad… plain bad. Well guess what gearheads? I found his Dad!

I was still a little broken up about the whole KK situation and I’ll be honest with you, I let him know! And then he responded in kind. Jeez! This guys not that big but man he packs a whallup!

Don’t worry though, a little bit of ice and the swelling went down. My glasses flew off my head but they were alright. You should have seen what I did to him afterward! I ran… That’s right, I ran! I’m not ashamed to say it. I ran like hell! That guy’s mean! Did you see the tattoos on his head?! What would you do, huh?

Yeah, so it started like that and it just got worse. Here’s the way it works, ok? So I figure out what time I need to be where for my appointments (that would be autographs, etc.) and we take it from there. Well you’d think it’d be just as easy for everyone else wouldn’t you?!

the real KK puts the beat down on J

I tell you what, apparently it’s not. The only guy me and Bunty wanted to meet all day was Weird Al. Guess what?! Weird Al didn’t care. Look at this. We waited… and waited… and waited…


we waited…	and waited…	and waited…

And guess what!? Weird Al shows up 45 minutes late! And guess what else?! We waited anyway! And then guess what else!? They cut off the line right as we got close! Not cool Weird Al! Not Cool!!! Worse than that we missed our photo op with Lemmy because we waited! Not cool Lemmy! Not Cool!!!

The following is a reenactment. It’s the way things should have been, alright? By now you must know that I’m not prone to exaggeration or drama, yeah? Well, here are some photos of what I imagine it must have been like for those lucky few who met Weird Al and Lemmy. It’s incredible what you can do with image enhancement these days isn’t it?


J meets Weird Al!	J meets Lemmy!!

I’ll be honest you innerweb. I was disappointed – sorely disappointed. Somehow I was under the impression that everybody wants to be your friend when your 967 miles away. Turns out I was totally wrong. What a drag.

And then guess what?!?! So we’re walkin’ around skulking when we see who!? Keith friggin’ Morris! Yeah! That’s right! Ever hear of the Circle Jerks you turds!?! If not, please follow the link because I think you’ll be pleased. I don’t want to gush here but their album VI was an integral part of my high school survival. Now this one was a real surprise for me and as you can see by the photo poor Keith was surprised too. And by surprised I mean pissed… or bummed I guess. Turns out he’s one of those guys who didn’t really want to be hassled for photos but I couldn’t resist and as I explained to him how important I thought his music was I think he came around.

Things gradually got better. We were lucky enough to run into the DBZ girls a little later. DBZ is a guitar company founded by Dean B. Zalinsky. That’s the Dean in Dean, sucka. The DBZ girls are a nice bunch of ladies who really seem to care a lot about the history and the future of the music industry in America. It’s inspiring and refreshing to know that the real spirit of Rock & Roll is alive and kicking these days!

Check back tomorrow for the third and final installment of

Keith Morris totally rules!!

J with the DBZ girls

Reader Comments

J, I totally forgive you. To be frank, I was distracted by my own personal Fernandes girl right here, if you know what I mean. And by “know”, I mean Know.

Written By Steve on January 19th, 2010 @ 9:50 pm